Story Structure — 4 Plot Phases
The Butchers' Directive
Dullard, a gardener and handyman, receives a mission from two butchers to travel to Chinatown. The objective is to meet his business rival, Fred 'Madman' Mertz, and resolve their professional dispute.
Key Events
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Introduction of Dullard — Gardener and handyman Dullard is introduced as the protagonist. Characters: Dullard
Location: Butcher Shop
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Butchers' Assignment — Two butchers assign Dullard a specific mission. Characters: Dullard
Location: Butcher Shop
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Mission Objective Revealed — Dullard learns his target is Fred 'Madman' Mertz. Characters: Dullard
Location: Butcher Shop
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Departure to Chinatown — Journey begins toward the business rival's location. Characters: Dullard
Location: Streets
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Parody Landscape — Film incorporates signature Apocalypse Now references humorously. Characters: Dullard
Location: Low-budget set
Journey to Chinatown
The narrative chronicles Dullard's travel sequence as he approaches the target location. The film humorously integrates low-budget parody elements and references to its source material during the transit.
Key Events
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Parody Landscape — Film incorporates signature Apocalypse Now references humorously. Characters: Dullard
Location: Low-budget set
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Arrival in Chinatown — Protagonist reaches the target location for the meeting. Characters: Dullard
Location: Chinatown
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First Encounter with Mertz — Dullard meets the eccentric 'Madman' rival. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown alley
Confrontation and Parody
Dullard arrives in Chinatown and encounters Mertz, initiating the core business dialogue. Their interaction highlights the film's satirical take on cinematic tropes and production constraints.
Key Events
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Business Proposal — 'Take care of business' directive is formally discussed. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown office
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Low-Budget Reality — Production constraints are humorously highlighted on screen. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Visible set
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Parody Elements Integration — Film references original movie's key scenes and themes. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown
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Narrative Divergence — Story branches into different narrative paths. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown
Alternate Endings and Release
The story diverges into multiple narrative branches, showcasing several alternate conclusions to the business mission. The film concludes with meta-commentary on its parody nature and distribution history.
Key Events
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Narrative Divergence — Story branches into different narrative paths. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown
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Alternate Ending A Setup — First potential conclusion begins to unfold. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown
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Alternate Ending B Setup — Second potential conclusion begins to unfold. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown
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Climax of Confrontation — Peak tension occurs during the business resolution. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown
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Resolution of Business — Mission objective is finally addressed and settled. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown
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Meta Commentary — Parody intent and comedic humor are acknowledged. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Chinatown
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Compilation Release — Film is included in the Hardware Wars compilation. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Warner Home Video
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Modern Availability — Film becomes available on DVD for modern audiences. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Pyramid Direct Films
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Director's Vision — Ernie Fosselius' parody approach and creative intent explained. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Production set
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Audience Reception — Low-budget humor is appreciated by viewers over time. Characters: Dullard, Mertz / Kilroy
Location: Screening room
This spoof of 'Apocalypse Now' has health inspector Will Dullard travelling by car "uptown" with two friends to have a meeting with a certain Mertz, the owner of a meat processing shop, to "investigate with extreme prejudice."